My mother in law lives in our house. I bet there really is not much else I have to say about that. When I agreed to let her move in I was right in the middle of nursing school AND it was told to me that it was TEMPORARY. Here we are four years later and no steps toward a change.
This, I would say, is the foundation of my stress right now. I finally had a talk with hubby about it and put a time limit on it. She does not pay us rent, she does not help with food or any of the utilities and we have her on our cell phone plan. I am done. He works for a railroad so is gone quite a bit so I don't think he quite understands what it is I am feeling. Not only is she costing us extra money just by being here but one of his brothers really oversteps his welcome in my house because his mom lives here. He will walk in without knocking, goes through the refrigerator, get on our computer and various other things without asking. I have a real problem with that. I told hubby if he did not say something to his brother I will and it will not be nice at all. Now, she does have her own space complete with big bedroom, full bathroom, walk in closet and an entire other bed room that she uses as her living room. She does not help with any house work and usually spends her days on the phone or reading a book. My kids are 9 and 12 and this is not the kind of example I want set for them. She is a very lazy person and seems to be happy living that way. Well, of course, why not. Living with us she does not have to do a damn thing. She is physically able to live on her own so she needs to go do it. What I don't understand is why does she not want to have her own place? This is why I put a time limit on it, I know, I know, it sounds harsh but like I said, no one asked me if she could stay here until she died.
Other issues I have with this arrangement is;
if I am at work and hubby is at work, she is letting the kids do what ever they want and NOT following the rules we have set. Apparently she also feel she is entitled to go on OUR family outings ALL THE TIME, being informed of where I am going and what I am doing and actually getting irritated when hubby leaves the house without telling her he is going. Last I checked we are both in our 30's and don't need to check in with mommy every time we want to leave the house. If on the rare chance she is watching the kids, that is one thing but when they are not being left then it is none of her business.
This is causing me so much stress that him and I are starting to have issues. We have not had "issues" before. We are a normal couple that of course has had problems along the way but this is way different. I would just like to be able to walk naked through my house when the kids are at school, I want to be loud during sex with hubby when he is home and the kids are at school. I want to be able to have quiet time in my own home!!!!
A Long Time Coming...
7 months ago